Being Publicly Private

blogger, fashion, split, holiday, croatia, style blogger, lifestyle blogger
Hvar, Croatia

 

Please check out SKYLISH.CO.UK for the new look. You are currently reading this blog via Bloglovin’ or on my old interface as the new website is integrated to Bloglovin’.

 

Hellooo folks. I know I said I would be posting weekly and then conveniently missed the next week but I had a good excuse for once – I spent just over a week in the beautiful city of Split, Croatia for my errr, annual summer “baecation”. A full travel post will be up soon but honestly, the break was seriously, seriously needed. In the mean time, I wanted to write up a post about something that has been playing on my mind recently, particularly in Croatia.

I think it’s quite typical for us all on social media to occasionally receive the odd creepy message. Whilst I was in Croatia and tagging my Instagram stories with my location (note that these tags would be ambiguous i.e. my story may say I’m in Split, Croatia, but I would never actually share where I was, unless it was in hindsight (i.e. 2 days ago, I visited restaurant “X”)), I was receiving quite a few strange messages from people who I don’t know that are based in Croatia saying something along the lines of “hey – where abouts are you? I live in Croatia! :)” Meanwhile, I unknowingly had my number as a contact option on my new fitness Instagram account which led to me getting a number of strange calls from all over the world – I’m talking India, Pakistan, the US and Holland before I finally realised my data hadn’t just somehow been compromised.

Basically what I’m trying to say is, recently, the internet has been leaving me pretty creeped out.

It got me thinking about the idea of being publicly private. Yes, I use social media and yes, I even write this blog. But to the contrary, I’m actually very careful and thoughtful about what and how much I share to keep myself as safe as possible, and I thought it’d be useful to share a few of the things I take into consideration.

Where do you go often?
A little while back, I’d occasionally tag a few photos I’d taken in the gym with the location of my gym. I figured tagging the gym instead of “London, United Kingdom” seemed a bit more focused and may aid in targeting the demographic I want to reach. Also, I saw that a number of influencers, some with hundreds and thousands of more follows than me, also did the same. Eventually, after having a bit of a think, I decided to untag my gym from every photo it was in previously. Now nowhere on social media can you link me to the gym I go to. Given that influencers with over 500k followers take a different approach – you may ask what made me think I was so special? I came to the conclusion that whether you have 500 or 500m followers, it only takes one strange person to find your account online and develop a creepy obsession. If somebody knows where you are regularly – it becomes a lot easier to be located. In my opinion, it’s best to keep that sort of information to yourself.

Well, where are you now?
Another time, I was eating lunch nearby my apartment and considered sharing the location. I thought – if the wrong person sees this, it’d be easy to piece things together about my everyday location – and I don’t exactly live in a gated community. Now, if you’re tagging that you’re at Wireless, the O2, Covent Garden or in general somewhere very “obvious”, I don’t think it’s an issue; but it’s specific locations I’d be wary about. For example, whilst in Croatia, I never once tagged my hotel (I’ll obviously share it now in hindsight when I write up my travel post), I’d also only tag my location in photos after I had already left such location (for example, restaurants). I think getting a message from some dude in Croatia asking me “where I was” definitely confirmed this was the right approach (and put the fear of God into me).

Getting used to the block button
Now I don’t block every person that appears in my DMs, often the messages can be quite harmless. However, if something seems particularly off, I will never hesitate to hit down that block button. In addition, if anyone ever DMs me and all that is included is a photo – I hit block straight away, I don’t even need to open the photo. In the words of Ovie Soko – I’m tired.

I remember once when I was young, I was using MSN messenger chatting to a computer called “Smarter Child” – everyone at school had been adding this so called computer on MSN (which I genuinely believe it was). For some reason that day my mum asked me who I was talking to, and for some even stranger reason I truthfully told her; she freaked out and banned me from MSN for the rest of the week with an order to delete the Smarter Child contact. Whilst I believed it was over the top given I thought I was smart enough to tell it was a computer – I totally get it. Honestly, there’s all types of crazy and scary shit on the internet; and these days, data is getting hacked and social media makes everything just that bit more accessible. Being “publicly private” is a new-age skill to master. I don’t think one has to refrain from social media all together (unless that floats your boat), but we just have to “think smart” when we’re using it. Remember: Everybody doesn’t have to know everything.

Jul 30 2019 at 9:41 pm   ·   Leave a Comment   ·   Posted Under Uncategorized






Time for a Rebrand: A New Skylish

lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger

Long time no blog! I’m getting a bit too used to saying that but this time there’s an actual result from the long break – a brand new blog design! I kind of sat and had a think recently about what the heck I’m doing online. For a while now I’ve sort of followed my own standard formula – write blogs, take pictures in outfits sent to me by brands, link to the outfits, post them on Instagram, publicise my new blogs and so on an so forth. I wasn’t really thinking about what I was doing rather than going through the motions. I wasn’t really thinking about whether my blog and “Skylish” as a whole was a true representation of me – as I currently am – a girl in my 20s who likes to write, eat, go to the gym, find out cool stuff about the world and occasionally tun up.

I’m still rewriting my formula. And I wanted to start off a fresh start with a brand new blog design. Many of you will know that I actually taught myself to code basic HTML/CSS/PHP at the ripe old age of 10! For a while in my mid-teens I would sell coded designs to customers. But when I started university my love for this sort of fell out of the picture and so my knowledge of coding and webdesign is similarly stuck back 5 years or so in the past. As much as I wanted to hold onto being the only person to ever create a design for this blog – I know my knowledge is just no longer good enough to code and design something like what you see here. But – I’m a grown adult now, and I don’t mind paying someone to hep me out when it comes to achieving my goals. So that’s what you see here – a crisp, responsive and no longer ancient design. There are still some tweaks to be made – but it’s definitely more or less there.. and I’m pretty excited about it.

lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger
lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger

Now – with that new design out of the way, you may be wondering how much of my “Skylish” formula I’ve actually rewritten. What is really going to change here? So here we go…

  • More frequent posts – One post a week shouldn’t be so difficult, and honestly, it isn’t. But the weekend happens, sleep must happen and then all of a sudden it’s Sunday night and you’re getting ready for the week ahead. Essentially, I need to go back to being disciplined
  • Refocusing back on what I care about – If you strip away all things social media and all things #ad; #gifted, I am a writer at heart. Sometimes when I write here, the posts are just meant to be light hearted. But a lot of the time I really want to encourage some thought and/or share my experiences and offer advice to women just like me. I don’t want to get lost in likes and free things just “because”, it makes it easy to forget the “why”. This means not only more thoughtful blogging but also more thoughtful collaborations (and honestly, I’ve got some cool ones coming up!) After all, I am blessed to be the position that I can afford to be selective with my choices, so I’ll utilise that
  • Taking it back to being a hobby To be honest, since I’ve been more thoughtful about what I put online and not stressing too much over the little details, I’ve been enjoying it all a lot more. It’s one of the reasons I started up Skylish Fit – I stripped things back to the bare bones and thought, actually, what do I want to do? I wanted to make a fitness page – so I did it. Now that’s not to mean I won’t take my blog seriously, not at all; but I want it to be something I enjoy and am passionate about rather than something I feel I have to always count revenues from
  • More of the same – More of what has seasoned Skylish over the years. Thoughtful posts, my life, some funny ish and some style here and there too
lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger
lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger

TL;DR: More creativity, more to make you think, less stressing. Happiness all around!

Anyhow – I hope you all like this new layout and a new vision for Skylish! There are still a few tweaks to make over here to get the new design perfect, but I’ll be making them over the coming weeks.

I’m excited for this fresh start and what better time than H2 to get things kicking…

If there’s anything you’d like to see here – let me know. Otherwise – have a fab week. 🙂

lifestyle, advice, webdesigner, webdesigner, new blog post, fbloggers, lifestyle blogger, style blogger

Top: Zara NYC
Photography Marianna Olaleye

Please check out SKYLISH.CO.UK for the new look. You are currently reading this blog via Bloglovin’ or on my old interface as the new website is integrated to Bloglovin’.

Jul 16 2019 at 9:19 pm   ·   Leave a Comment   ·   Posted Under Lifestyle